2008: the exciting conclusion

part 2

Part 3: December

Alistair texts me while I’m out shopping. I’m surprised because I haven’t heard from him since April? May? When I wouldn’t give any explanation for not wanting to see him anymore. The truth is that I had bigger hopes for how things would happen with [Nickname].

Ali wants to get together. It’s not a good night for me because [Nickname]’s having a party. But Ali insists, so I say I’ll stop by on the way.

It never rains, you know?

I’m careful not to drink straight out of bottles. I want this to be a good party. I’m in a party dress and everything.

I don’t realize how drunk [Nickname] is when we all head out to a place across the street. He insists that I leave all my stuff in his apartment “because you’re coming back.” But while I’m talking to Tabor, Ty pukes on us. Seriously. Then he disappears. [Nickname]’s doorman lets us in even though no one’s answering the phone. [Nickname]’s there with some girl. And my stuff’s in the bedroom. Mac doesn’t live there, but he’s locked in there with a girl of his own.

I insist that I’m taking the subway home. It’s 3 a.m. Tabor hails a cab, puts me in it, and follows me in. He wants me to just stay at his place because it’s closer. I’ve just met him that night. And I’m covered in puke. I do not understand boys. He tells me he’s not like [Nickname] and Mac, but I want to go home. He gives me money for the cab ride the rest of the way and gets out.

Things are out of hand, and I’m exhausted.



I’m great at dating. I’ll wear something cute and curl my hair and the conversation won’t stop.

I’m trying to be better at relationships. So I’m taking a break, and I’m not going to start back until I’ve tidied up all these loose ends.


p.s. we named him Prince Charming.

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The Brooklyn Boy said...

'S a fair plan. Hope you can stick to it -- that's the tricky part, ha. I usually fail there.

magda said...

Your distinction between dating and relationships makes a lot of sense. Sometimes a break is the best thing, a chance to take a breath and see clearly before diving back into the fog.