So now that I went a month without kissing anyone, I need a date as soon as possible. Everything else is all set, I just need to start back.
1 2 3 Go.
I was thinking about it anyway, and there was a poster for one of those free dating sites in the subway. I decided to look into it.
I had looked at the other free one, but there was a little too much of a Kid Rock vibe there: too much waist length hair and shirtless-ness.
This other free one? Too much of a desperate vibe.
You have to write approximately four sentences about yourself while you are signing up. Mine was filler garbage. I just wanted to have a look at the boys before I made an effort to be clever and flirty.
Within seconds, I got an instant message from a guy telling me, “Nice profile.”
What? Did you even read it?
And I didn’t post a picture, so it wasn’t that.
The boys on that site aren’t from Manhattan or even boroughs. They’re from suburbs. Gross.
I guess I’ll have to go back to free internet dating the old-fashioned way: making up new email addresses and doing free 3-day trials on Match.com .