25.1.10

in honor of what is reportedly the most depressing day of the year

I am tired of wearing boots and there’s not a number over freezing on the ten-day forecast and it’s still getting dark at 4:30. I’m not dressed at 5:30, and I’m not sure how long those dishes have been in my sink. I was going to do Projects before I have to go back to work on Monday, but maybe showering counts as a Project. Fruitcake does not count as dinner. I haven’t been drinking enough water.

Happy New Year.

I effing hate January.

I’m going to turn 28 on Tuesday. Twenty-eight seems old. I know the date and details of my 10-year high school reunion. I should have done Something by now. Maybe not getting fat counts as Doing Something.

I remember my parents when they were 28. I was five and they were grownups who were Responsible Caretakers.

I am Happy. I have a boyfriend I like and a job that other people want and some days I realize that I live a life of suburban daydreams. I have Plans and at least one really good Idea.

I am accepting invitations and finding activities, because I know that the clutching sensation at my back, creeping down the undersides of my arms is just from too many carbs and the January-ness of it all.

~beatrix

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4 comments:

DSS said...

Hmmm...today is Tuesday. Is a Happy Birthday in order then?

If so, I hope it's a splendid one!

PS. Carbs make everything better. Just keep eating them :)

Mae December said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! :)

25 was pretty depressing. 26 has been awesome. I hope it's not like an every other year is horrible type thing from now on.

<3

curly su said...

Happy= ?

I keep saying I'm happy too, but I don't even know what that means.

And then, Something? What is that? - you have a job and a boy and friends, apparently? So what is it that you want to do?

Because maybe that something will make you Happy.

72suburbs said...

January's balls, isn't it? The good news is that the year can only improve from here.

Happy birthday, one day late!